Even as a child, I loved the cynical hecklers Statler and Waldorf. They were so MEAN and so FUNNY. Then there was the Swedish Chef, 100% certifiably nuts. With knives. Add to that the raving bitch Miss Piggy. Now we're talking about a quality kids show! We have two ornery old men that heckle people, an insane chef with weapons and a bitch who nonstop nags her lover. My kind of show. I feel like Jim Henson and I would have gotten along swell (side note - I feel like swell comes from combining so and well.. makes sense). Looking back, it's no wonder that I loved it. Half the characters were just that, characters. I hope that one day I'm old and grouchy and have some to heckle with like Statler and Waldorf. That would be the perfect end to cap off my life. I hope I have their laughs too, so heartwarming.
By now some of you are thinking, "Ok, if we just back away quietly, we won't spook her and alert her that we've run off." It's ok, I know deep down there's a muppet inside each of you. (That's what she said. Bazinga.)
I leave you with Sam the Eagle.
Video from YouTube user VaughnMichael. Thanks for making my day.